


washing machine heart

by dietmobu



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Episode: s03 Chat Blanc, F/M, Identity Reveal, New York City, Unresolved Emotional Tension, centimonster chat blanc, yeah angst oops
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:42:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29649432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dietmobu/pseuds/dietmobu
Summary: Set right after the New York special, Chat Noir deals with some inner turmoil about where things left off with Ladybug. After making a hasty decision to try to gain her trust back, he now faces his greatest foe: Himself.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	1. dirty shoes

The cotton sheets were heavenly, freshly washed and still tucked in on the sides, keeping him wrapped in. The sun only barely peaked through the expansive windows, yellow and buttery light layering the edges of where Adrien’s hair peaked out from his covers. Just slightly awake, the perfect inbetween where the warmth of the last bits of his dream pressed against him like fog on glass, he found himself sighing into the early morning.

The ring of his alarm was a gentle reminder beside him, a long awaited beep that he’d been expecting since his first beginnings of consciousness. He had a lot to face today, and these last few minutes of peace were all loved. His everything ached like usual, the stress of the battle mixed with the exhaustion of high emotions taking its toll on him at last. It was a Sunday, thankfully, but he knew there’d be no rest.

He had to explain to Ladybug.

Finally silencing his alarm and sluggishly getting to his feet, Adrien let himself watch the sunrise for just a minute. It blossomed over the buildings every morning, like a beacon signifying his new day. Sometimes clouds would paint it’s edges, or completely obscure it’s glow, but he felt it burn through his windows anyway. It was stagnant, in a sweet way. He briefly thought of watching it with Marinette a few days ago.

“Adrien?” a voice called, Natalie. “Are you awake yet?”

“Yes, Natalie! I’ll be down for breakfast in a minute,” he called back, his voice a bit rough and coarse from his use of it the days prior. 

He wasn’t a silent crier, and he was sure the wind from traveling back had done a number on his growing sickness. He’d been in the rain for quite a while after leaving Ladybug and Plagg, and could feel a sickness seeping through his bones already.

“Adrien?” Plagg suddenly squeaked from his bundle of bed, looking at him almost nervously.

Immediately, Adrien felt the weight of abandoning Plagg pull him down again as he let his eyes fall to his small black kwami. His chest pinged.

“Goodmorning, Plagg,” he started, going to grab his clothes for the day, “about last night. I-”

“Adrien! It’s no problem!" the kwami rushed out. "I mean, I’m here with you now, aren’t I? Things got fixed- it was a little mistake.”

“But it wasn’t little. I could have never seen you again, all because I chose a selfish answer to making things right...”

“Trust me, Adrien. You’re not the first Chat Miraculous holder to throw a tantrum like that!” Plagg exclaimed, diving right into his 6 A.M. cheese stash. With that, Adrien left out a sigh of relief. At least Plagg didn’t hold this against him, he could always trust his kwami to let go of things with ease. 

Quickly getting dressed and combing through his hair, Adrien headed out to eat his breakfast. He might as well fill his stomach, knowing what was ahead of him that day.


	2. my washing machine heart

Marinette sighed, long and exhausted. Her flight had thankfully gone smoothly, no American villain attacks, and finally she’d collapsed back to her bed. Tikki watched silently as she pulled off her shoes and jeans, feeling the airport peel off her with every item she removed. Between the battle, the rain, Adrien, Chat Noir, _everything_ , she could feel her muscles pull tight between her shoulder blades and her eyelids hang heavy with the need to sleep. Despite it being 3 in the afternoon, she could already feel her need for sleep overpowering all her senses.

“Marinette! Don’t fall asleep like that!” Tikki called out, but Marinette could already feel her consciousness slipping away like honey off a spoon, languid and inviting.

-

Adrien felt the powers of Chat Noir wrap around him, static lifting his hair up with a charge of energy. Every sense in his body demanded he give it a rest and just go to bed, between fencing lessons and Kagami and more fencing lessons, Chinese practice, Natalie and his cold father, texts left unreplied to from Nino, _everything_ , the last thing he needed to be doing was hopping from Paris rooftop to Paris rooftop to find someone he didn’t even know for certain would be out.

The night air was frigid, but kept him alert. He could feel his inner cat, and his inner Adrien, yearning for warm sheets and tranquil sleep, but his insistence on seeing Ladybug burned bright under his ribs, like he’d toss and turn all night if he didn’t see her right this moment.

After jumping from roof to roof for an hour, Chat thought maybe he didn't see her because was moving too much. Finally settling for their usual meet-up spot, he let the little remote control slip through his fingers. He wanted to see her, badly, but he didn’t want her to distrust him any more with a faulty call.

Then, he heard it. The fall of feet, soft as a butterfly and light as a flower petal, none other and only his lady.

“Ladybug!” he called out, turning around to find a gruesome sight.

Mayura. Her eyes were as dark as the starry night, her skin a porcelain smooth but sickly purple spread across high cheekbones. Her hair, blue and silky, shone under the moonlight as it slicked around her hairpiece. She was breathtaking, terrifying, and most of all, she was unexpected.

Chat Noir felt fear flood his veins like fire through a forest, igniting his heart into an insistent pounding. His face suddenly felt hot, his knees weak. It was unlike him to be filled with dread, to be filled with uncertainty, but here he was faced with one of his greatest foes, and his Ladybug wasn’t in sight. He didn’t even know if she was back from her trip!

“Mayura!” he called out, taking a fighting stance despite his wavering voice. The button control slipped into his belt, a tool to contact his Lady for his dire situation.

But what if this was his chance to have her trust him again? What if this was his ticket to redeem himself? If he could prove he could protect Paris without her, she would believe in him again. She’d know he was good enough on his own, that he was _worthy_ of being Chat Noir!

“Chat Noir, you’re filled with grief tonight. It seeps off your bones like waves of heat,” she cooed, her voice wicked like lightning.

“Grief? You’ve got me all wrong Miss Mayura, it seems you’ve just _cat_ me in a tricky situation!” Chat Noir exclaimed, backing up slightly. He could feel his nerves soak back into him, preparing himself for what's to come.

“Oh kitty, where's your Ladybug? New York is the city of dreams, but it feels like yours were crushed upon arrival,” she laughed into her fan of feathers, the cold night air ruffling through them both. “You know, when the cat’s away the mice will play, but it seems you won't be gone for this one!”

Plucking a single feather from her fan, she quickly brought life to its pure white feathers in a flurry of dark magic. Chat Noir had never actually seen something be evilized before, but it brought a chill down his spine. His feet felt cold in anticipation, waiting for the centimonster to be brought to fruition.

“Chat Noir, your grief for Ladybug and your feelings of remorse turn insistual inside you. I, Mayura, will give life to these feelings! See to it that your destruction aids your inner hurt!” she yelled, the feather crackling like a dying fire. He watched in fear and anticipation as it bloomed into his own personified feelings.

Himself.

It’s shining white suit cut edges into the pitch black night, glittering with the fractions of moon hitting its chest and shoulders. Stark white hair blew wild as the wind picked up, ears adorning the top of its head, perking up in excitement.

He gasped at the sight of himself, all white with wild eyes, laughing into the night sky

  
  



	3. bang it up

Marinette woke slowly, feeling her sore muscles ache from the position she’d quickly fallen asleep in. Tikki continued snoozing off next to her, and she let herself sigh back into her pillow. For now, for just this moment, she felt a little bit okay.

She’d dealt with so much. It was natural to be afraid when there was nothing to be fearful of. It was natural to be on the edge constantly, to never feel relaxed, to always be alert and aware. It was like constantly living with a string pulled taut in her chest, like for the past year and a half she’d only ever been _prepared._

Her mind was uncontrollable, at times. It would flash images in her head, insistent and terrifying, unfortunate and devastating. Often, Chat Blanc would prattle on everytime she closed her eyes, or villains would reappear in her dreams. She had a new living nightmare to catch her off guard now, one as fresh as baked macaroons.

Chat Noir’s cataclysm grazing the shoulder of Aeon. The look that spread across his face, true and pure horror. An echo of Chat Blanc shining through.

-

“Chat Blanc, the manifestation of Chat Noir’s inner turmoil, I give you the power to wreak destruction on whatever you please! Irreversible without Ladybug!” Mayura yelled into the night, humor emphasizing each vowel. She smiled wide, her wide teeth cracking her cheeks apart, evil and blissfully aware.

This was it, Mayura must have read him. She must know he planned on taking her on by himself, she must know that his destruction is ultimate and horrific without his Lady’s healing Lucky Charm. _She knows._

His own self is being used against him, his own pain, his own aching heart. Rage pounded through him, his heart frantic and arhythmic. He felt like he was inflamed.

“Chat Blanc, prepare to be destroyed!” he shouted, charging forward with his staff gripped tightly.

“Aw, what's wrong? You know, it’s rude to rain on another cat's litter box!” his copy purred, hands glowing white and filled with power.

Chat Noir went for a punch to the stomach, a place he himself knew would be sensitive, but just as his fist was about to make contact, Chat Blanc jumped over his head and placed his palm flat on the building's terrace fence. It sizzled away into dust, gone. Destroyed.

Chat Noir tried not to be phased by his mistake, instead charging again with the same ferocity. Once more, Chat Blanc dodged him and ran swiftly to the edge of the terrace, jumping off with a single mischievous wink and a gust of wind. Chat Noir quickly ran to look over the edge where his copy had fallen, watching for only a moment as Chat Blanc continued to press his fingers to everything in sight down below.

It all dispersed into dust before Chat Noir's eyes, the glass windows he touched, the light poles and the trash cans, the trees, the bricks he’d let his fingers graze across as he ran by.

Chat Noir felt his limbs getting heavier with anxiety, his breath rapid and burning through his lungs. His sore throat had roughened up after Chinese practice, his body feverish with the combination of sickness and current panic drowning his system. Chat Blanc was creating horrific damage, damage Chat Noir couldn’t dream of fixing without his Lady.

His plan was backfiring already, his redemption slipping through his fingers like weighted grains of fine sand. He took one glance back at Mayura, laughing as she watched the chaos unfold. Snarling, he pulled himself away from her. He knew she was a formidable opponent, but Chat Blanc was wreaking havoc on the Paris night.

“Chat Blanc! Face me!” he yelled as he approached again, his adversary currently occupied with batting away at Andre’s unattended ice cream parlor.

“I have a job to do! Mugs to knock down and dogs to hiss at! Marinette’s to find and Ladybug miraculous to grab!” he cackled, spinning around and letting his cataclysm fade away the roadside bushes.

“Marinette? Marinette Du-pen Cheng?” he whispered, feeling his thoughts fairly sluggish in his brain. What did Marinette have to do with this? Was this centi-monster clinging to his sadness of disappointing Marinette with his departure? 

“Oh, a little kitty alone, a little kitty alone without his lady!” Chat Blanc screamed, his voice like a banshee in the still Paris night. Chat Noir looked around nervously, it would be even more so a nightmare if someone were to come out their home with Chat Blanc’s careless destruction. Who knows what could happen?

“Don’t sing that! That’s _my_ song!” Chat Noir growled, using his staff to propel him high in the air. He planned on something reckless, but it needed to work. Marinette’s bakery was on the corner, and he didn’t want to imagine this white evil breaching her family’s sweet bakery.

“Aw what’s wrong? Meow you want to disappear too?” he sang, his pupils like a crescent moon in his blue eyes.

“Cataclysm!”

“Two can do that!”

Chat Noir fell upon his white dressed twin, their hands lightened with pure destruction and aimed right above the others chest. Chat Noir let out a breath of surprise, his eyes wide with fear, looking forever into Chat Blanc’s equally large ones. His, however, were filled with delight. Like a cat staring down his meal of fresh tuna, his mouse under his palm, he licked his lips and laughed in triumph.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> oui, donc, je veux écrire un histoire pour le new york special. je ne peux pas attendre pour s4 ! donc, voila. j'espère que tu l'aime !


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